Vow to Love

because positive should be the new drum, negativity is abolished from the songs. the motto of this blog is to love oneself, for it is the buried treasure. the writer of this message gets confused sometimes as to what is and what isn't supposed to be in mind but as i live i grow and learn that to be a master of the art of living one must give their all in order bathe in the bliss of self knowledge and the spirit of the world. one cannot reach completion until one has been on the course. only in the middle of the course is where you begin to seek your way out into the promised land that is your purpose. we strive to please and make those around us at ease, though knowledge of self and a comfortable fit should be what we desire. for if the time has come for you to rest your worries in completion it is then you realize no one is among you. i made a vow to myself that this lifetime would be the one where i would find love. and it is on this day that i've learned that the love i shall find is always within, so that if no one knew of me those that do would know that she is the one that loved herself most of all and it didn't come as a misfortune to others. -Janus

Vices, Weakness' and the Damage They Bring (demons)

demons come in many forms: vices, loved ones, bosses, the love for material things, memories, complacency, avenues/choices, hobbies, etc. and their central purpose is to take you off your game or your chosen path. these forms are also our weaknesses which is where the conflict begins: we must conquer our weaknesses or they will get the best of us and never give it back due to regret, bitterness and unforgiving. knowing is 1/2 the battle so now that you know what will you do about it? let them roam or fight? whatever you chose to do remember it's your life, your decision. most people don't want to hear this kind of talk. they feel it's too creepy or it hits to close to emotions, but we have become a dumbed down culture unaware of the mess we put ourselves in until it's too late to climb out the gutter.

-Janus

what will it take

for me to see my dreams come true

what will it take to reach you

since i don't know what to do

poetry is in my heart

so is the freedom of man

sometimes i believe can conquer all

most times i think i can't

what will it take

to sit in the directors chair

on the board

soaring

unbored with this precious life that has been awarded me? -Janus

The Power Within

why does it take someone else to tell us about ourselves? are we a society that's so self-oblivious that we can do nothing without the approval of others? as we walk and drive the streets we pass one another and sometimes we don't even crack a smile or say a friendly hello. are we only comfortable in our click bubble? can we not embrace one another anymore? don't we think that we are genuinely nice people? well, why do we treat one another with such disregard? i think we are allowing the hardships of life to sink our spirits into a place we never thought they would be. as children life's possibilities seem so available to us, but if we don't have wisdom teachers among us things get really tricky as you develop a sense of self and find that time has passed by as you are now ready to step up to the plate. of course these words are for those that don't have everything "together"; these words are for those that have a need to make things better inside therefore eventually showing up in production. it seems so many people have the security we all wish for. they "have it all" so we want our piece as well. but we have different chemistry so our experiments will differ. as americans we come from many walks of life and many different countries and we all can experience life's abundance's. but first we have to remember that everything we desire must be conquered in the mind letting nothing or no one keep us behind. -Janus

Just BE Me…
I like taking walks and sitting along the beach discovering what life means for me and what my purpose is
I like moving in upward directions even if that means left
I like going against the grain only to learn it’s not 100% fun at times, it’s hard and no one understands what I’m doing going against the grain
I like growing
I like learning
I don’t like folks telling me what I can’t do. How does that help me? What I can’t do doesn’t matter
What I can does!
What I will does!
I hate that I have allowed thoughts to move me off my focused dream path

based on ignorant ideals of loved ones
But I’m not mad
And I’m back on it
It’s fun knowing I have arrived to my own life
The existence carved out just for me
Living is growing and learning
But most importantly
It’s a matter of allowing me to just BE. -Janus

Black…
If I were a fisher of man I am still waiting for you to catch a hook
A hook into the realm of black reality in America
Understand that I am not a Revolutionary Poet
My poetry is a revolution
A resolution to change the energy that surrounds the being that’s unsettled inside of me
My mind that has boiled over time and time again wants us all to recognize that we have to walk this path together in order to reach a higher reality
A higher time in our lives to be understood and kept for further generations
Black is the most beautiful color to me
Black is many colors
Black is my color Black is your color Even if you aren’t black you want to be-I Would. Black, you know, I just love to say it: my people, black people I Love You, I Love Myself and we have been mis-represented here for sometime now. And the crazy thing is we’ve become so numbed to it that it’s embarrassing to talk about. About how we have no non buffoonery images to grow upon on a consistent basis on the small and silver screens ‘cause we can’t keep our meager fare out of bootleg pirates’ pockets. We “learn how to be” from Britney Spears and Paris then obtain fashion from twisted heads and Katie Holmes because she married Tom Cruise, are you serious? Oh, that’s right we’ve got Girlfriends-nope that’s gone now, The Game and countless reruns of The Cosby Show, A Different World and Good Times….I guess I should be happy. But somehow I’m not. I look around and I’m not seeing enough of myself so I begin to think I’m white but I’m not…I’m beautifully Black
A sista
Big round bottom, wide hips, plump lips and soft skin
Come in-this is love
We are special, smart, intelligent, an intelligent work of art
Black Beautiful
Black is Beautiful
We must all feel this please
Without this understanding we forget our greatness. Black
If I were a fisher of men I am still waiting for you to catch a hook.
A hook into a realm of black reality in America.
Bite. -Janus

in this time of uncertainty there are things that must be guaranteed. we must live in a world that honors the greatness of those that strive for the best in order to show the ability to dream a new existence. there are many times when most of us are too lost to understand that there is much to be learned from our everyday occurances with one another. we don't stop to think that one single acceptence can change our scope of the truth leading us into greater perameters in space. we have become a lost world. a people that don't want to be found. we choose to drown into mediocrity in order make ourselves more available to our company-company we should be influencing rather than molding into. yes, there are things that are guaranteed: living. and that is something we all must do alone in our most intimate moments of reason. -Janus

where am i?

where am i on this course?

in this lane i shall meet those that want to love and nurture my broken spirit

you see my spirit has been confused and so have i

made to think we belong in the land of strong all our lives

we've learned that could never be true if truth is among you

and now we wait for the blessed day when our order is finished

only to be whole again

strong again

ready for the world

where am i on this course?

i'm mapping out my plan of action to conquer the poetic world

on a journey of love with myself and the one who created me

they are my best friend

our love will never end

and on this day

on this walk i am having with myself

i have experienced love in the highest form

a connection in my dreams

as now i have come to you

i will no longer try to figure it out

i know you're with me

and i gladly accept your offer to succeed

i am new today. -Janus

Truth

the truth is often where we never want to look

on the inside

'cause it never lies

we walk fine lines wishing for change to make things right

fighting ourselves to get a future together for the next generation

life is hard

and that's the truth

ain't nobody ever told me this

had to find out for myself

all i ever heard was take this

and now i walk by myself

i am in the woods.

and it's hard

but not over. -Janus

Delicious

delicious moves
make different waves
different waves shape the days of our existence
we dance to the delicious beats that flow thru the air waves of sound
forgetting our troubles as the world goes 'round
delicious
as we sit and rap a taste
delicious foods flow thru our mouths
as we smile of our happiness to be alive and well
life-so delicious
drinking water in a hot sweat-delicious
a view from the top-delicious
deliciousness should be a crime
but we make it a law
to be quality fit and fine for our seekers to seek
beautiful people make any experience delicious
second best need not apply
for this rhyme has no other reason but to be considered
Delicious. -Janus

Do You Remember???

for those of you that have gone thru your first milestone hump of life how did it feel? do you remember the day? these milestones are different for all of us. for the most part it's that time when you realize all you really have is yourself and one has to make decisions based on that alone in a way that doesn't alienate your loved ones. it's not a sad thing, really it's just the way that life takes us. we all come to this understanding at some point and we all deal with it in different ways. we put so much pressure on ourselves to be great because of what it looks like on the outward all the while we have no understanding of the layers that build up to the ultimate destination. that is the mountain. once over the mountain we realize that we've had the "stuff" the whole time but we didn't use it because it didn't "look" or "feel" how we thought it would based on popular consensus. that's just where we were in our minds. now that the first test has been won there will be others and it will take layers to get over those also. that, my friends, is the carnival of life. welcome to the woods. _Janus

Life...the Beautiful Mystery

life. it has many faces and can take you many places. it is a mere existence that we must conquer or it will conquer us. as Black Americans we've got much more to conquer. we have a nation that looks at us from behind as opposed to eye to eye. and although there is a community of blacks that are thriving well they, somehow, choose to hide from us that need their images in order to dream bigger. instead we live in this white dominant society that tries to emulate our culture yet ignores our true message which is to allow us to just be because we're all right just as we are without the extra "flack" caked upon us with all these unnecessary terms of being. it seems there will always be something to overcome; that is the nature of living. but we do it well don't we? you gotta have a sense of humor, goals, support,patience and love. oh and one more thing....money, i mean this is America-land of consumption! -Janus

Black Folk...
we "do what it do"
we let it all hang out
we wear big earrings
drive fancy cars
got alotta sense
we know we stars
we go to school
wear burgundy hair
never leave the hood
go everywhere
we black folk
and we good
we don't stop
'cause we can't stop
even after the casket drops
we live forever...thru music
t-shirts
poetry
books
style
smile
all the while being minoritized
why?
'cause we fly!
Ya Dig???
and ya'll know we get on each other's nerves but we love one another...
...while tryin' to define ourselves in this white world! -Janus

On This Day And Yesterday...
on this day and yesterday i've seen the clearest skies and the most untroubled waters
on this day and yesterday i've seen the most distinctive buildings (knowing that there's more to see)
on this day and yesterday i've seen life at it's finest and to you i just want to say hello in 2008.
for the wind that blows reminds me that life does have many faces. faces that we all must accept. it is then that the journey becomes our friend. no longer the frowned upon feared enemy. on this day and yesterday i accept nature....well, until the worst comes along anyway! -Janus

Life’s Rainbow…
I’m living my life for greatness
So I can’t be fake.
Every step
Every move is a calculated test
An examination of my comprehension
I am a student in this life
That is all I know how to be
Learning how to conquer my hurdles one by one
My fears
My strengths
My ignorance
My faults
My misunderstandings
My understanding of people
The greatest creation
Most people cannot be put into a box
They cannot be marked as one thing
We are not for show
We are beings of the same kind with assorted attributes
An ever changing rainbow
Kaleidoscope
We go in many directions
Oh the possibilities at the end of the rainbow
For some it is death
Some life
Some the beginning of the end
The selected few get the green bag filled with the riches of the world
How magnificent the shine!
And for those of us that are on our way to greatness, in ourselves we must believe
The time of struggle is our songs
Weekdays are melodies
To overcome is the top of the mountain
From then on we coast and truly live beautifully
Absorbing all things
Becoming new drifting through time capsules traveling
Cosmic
Touching the sky
Coming back full circle to the light in which we were born with _Janus

Politics…
Politics is a game
Some people say “it’s politics”
“politicing”
Politics is a game
Politics is a lesson learned
It is a pimp
It dismisses you and moves on
It drives you to the point that you need to be in your own frame of mind
Politics lets you know that it is already mapped out and planned
Yale will always win against UC, but it may not win against UCLA
And that is why dreamers succeed
They “Just Do It”
What is written doesn’t matter (it is what’s inside)
But it was written
In traditional black & white -Janus